A Steak Day that Worked

My weight creeped up again (I'm now using 231 as my unofficial LIW) and so I did a steak day to get it back down from just over 233, and lo and behold it worked! This was on tuesday, one of the more stressful days I've had over the last month and I wasn't sure I'd be able to hang on until dinner time. Thank goodness for tea, both iced and hot. I think I drank several gallons over the course of the day to keep me going! I was actually down to 230.4, but by Wednesday, had returned to my ubiquitous 231. I guess this is just where my body wants to be for now, and the low 230s is definitely a 'plateau' point for me, where I spent most of my 20s. Dr. Simeons says it can take time to get past a plateau, so I am sure my next round (scheduled to begin next Wednesday, and not a moment too soon) will go slower than my crazy Round 2 did. I'm actually hoping it does, that precipitous loss of 27lbs in just over 3 weeks was a little scary and definitely took a toll on my voice. I know I'm beginning this round much earlier than Simeon's advises, for immunity issues, but I think that since I only did a 23 injection round and I did skip an injection every week, I should be all right. If I encounter immunity issues, I will definitely stop, but again, that particular bridge isn't even on the horizon yet. I really can't wait to begin again.

Addendum

I just went back and read some of the new comments the likes of Willow and Susan have posted, and well, thank you ladies, for being so very kind! So true, this is a long -haul effort and I'm feeling much better about myself these last couple of days. You are wonderful!

Stability at Last

I am sorry I haven't bee posting regularly, and I promise I will get back to more or less daily posts after Wednesday of this coming week! Life does tend to get in the way of so many things! I have at least and at last stabilized, my weight has not budged in 4 or 5 days, however it is still 8lbs above my LIW (231lbs). Two steak days didn't bring my weight down more than a pound total and then there was some bad emotion-induced eating and I think I'm just going to have to live with where I'm at until I begin my third round on June 4th. It's ok, it's still 41 pounds below where I was in January, so for that I shall be grateful.

Phase three is tricky, this is true, and I wish I hadn't screwed up so colossally. I am not here to post details about my personal life outside my weight loss journey, but the catalyst was someone from my past making an unwelcome reappearance and triggering old habits. It has made me look at the way I interact with people and how much I let their energy consume me. Coupled with that, I am reading the wonderful book "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert, which has truly inspired a bit of a sea change in my life outlook. I am hoping the insights and revelations I'm gaining over the past couple weeks will help to strengthen me for June and July's 46-day austerity as I embark on Round 3.

An idea of what I've eaten over the past few days that has helped me to stabilize my weight:

Breakfast: 2 eggs, usually scrambled with a bit of the Trader Joe's Salsa Verde, and about 1-2 tsp of coconut oil, either taken in warm water or used to cook the eggs.

Lunch: a huge salad comprised of arugula and mixed greens with 1/2 sliced avocado (small) tomato, cucumber, walnuts and a small crumbling of bleu cheese. Dressed with olive oil and apple cider vinegar. Roast chicken breast.

Dinner: quite small, a bit of roast chicken dipped in hummus.

I did make some sugar-free pavlovas with raspberries and rose-water flavored whipped cream, quite lovely and summery. I use Z-sweet (Xylitol) in place of sugar, or sometimes Stevia. I find I'm still figuring out how to adjust these alternative sweeteners to get a good taste with a clean finish. My sweet tooth has most definitely diminished. Everything tastes too ungodly sweet to me these days. I find fruit is best for satisfying the Sweets Beast.

And I have continued my love affair with coffee, and am rejoicing in being able to order a breve latte now that half and half is on the menu. I don't have coffee like this every day, only on the ones which begin with an early morning that is preceded by a way too late night!

Speaking of which, lest this become one of the latter, I bid you an adieu. Til tomorrow.

Creeping Up

I feel like a right fool! I'm now 8lbs over my LIW, at 231lbs. Yesterday, while rehashing in my head everything that I've done wrong in Phase 3 thus far, I remembered something about NOT stopping the diet just as TOM arrives, of course far too late for me to do anything about it. My last VLCD day coincided with the start of my (late) period. Could it be that that is partly what is going on? That, combined with 3 days of careless eating. I'm back on track with eating only Simeons-approved foods for "Phase 3", and my weight, while not stabilizing yet, is creeping up more slowly. I hope to put a cap on the gain at 10lbs. That would still mean a 17lb loss over 3 weeks. Not too bad. I'm just itching to get back to Phase 2 in early June. One has much more control when one's options are more limited. And reading around, it does seem that short rounds are not as effective, especially when there is a lot of weight to lose. My next round may well be a full 40-injection/6-week round, as I did the first time.

So, phase 3 is most DEFINITELY the hardest part to this diet, and anyone entering into it should be fully aware that they should put as much, if not more effort into it as they do the low-cal part. The Lovely Susan H. has suggested I look into the Callahan/EFT techniques and I sheepishly admit, though those documents have been sitting in my HCG folder all these weeks, I have yet even to read them. Hopefully this will help. Plus, the massage I'm getting this afternoon to help relieve some of the stress I'm under. May 28 cannot come soon enough for me.

I am not good at Phase 3

Well, it's been a really high-stress week for me and some old eating patterns are back that I thought had been eradicated in my last round of HCG. I am hovering at 5lbs over my LIW and no steak day (have tried 2) seems to do the trick. My instinct (as ever) is to rationalize that I lost too fast and nothing but another round of HCG will get rid of those 5 lbs. I start again on the 4th of June, so I am going to try to remain circumspect and not let it get to me too much. I will still be down to 200 by the end of the summer, that's for sure! I am enjoying being back in the gym, taking water aerobics and pilates classes, I'll make the most of those in these next two weeks. Now if I can just keep the emotional eating at bay and make myself understand that it is NOT going to help me get through my big performance/exam on the 28th, I'll be all set.

Change of Plans

VLCD Final Days #24-26
Weight Sunday 5.11.08 223.8 (a loss of 1 lb) this is my LIW
Weight Monday 5.12.08 224.2 (a gain of .4lb)
Weight Tuesday 5.13.08 223.2 (a loss of 1.2 lbs, .6 below LIW)
Total Loss as of LIW 26.2lbs
Total # of injections: 23

Well, I decided to end this round early, having been so successful, but at the cost of my voice. The fatigue was really getting to me and I have been unable to keep up with the demands placed on me with my rehearsal and work schedule. I plan on starting my next round on June 4th, for another 23 days. This seems to work quite well for me, and I hope I'm able to lose as much over each of the next 2 or 3 rounds. My schedule calms down considerably in June, so I think I won't have as many fatigue issues. My goal was to be at or below 200 by the end of the summer, and it looks like that is a very real possibility! Provided, of course, that Phase 3 goes more smoothly this time than it did last time. I am really excited to get into the gym and build up some muscle, and even more excited to be eating a wider variety of foods! No milkshakes, at least not until my next load, I am really going to try to stay within the 2 lbs of LIW that Simeon's specifies. I bought a rotisserie chicken and some avocados, two things I have been really craving over the last 3 weeks. Lunch tomorrow is gonna be good!

I will do my next two rounds in quick succession, basing them the experimental 'short round' format with a one week break in between VLCD rounds. However, I will make a slight modification to this plan. I will skip one day of injections every week and I will also do a minimum of 23 injections, instead of the 21 specified by the 'short round' idea. I feel better doing the # of injections prescribed by Dr. Simeon's and hope that by skipping one day a week I won't run into any immunity issues. I may also take a two week break in between rounds, but this has more to do with my schedule than a Protocol-based reason. I hope to finish by mid-August with these next two rounds. Then, as I will be moving in early September, I will take a longer break, and resume for one final round beginning in early October, which I am hoping will finally get me down to my goal weight of 160. I may find that 180 is a more comfortable weight, but I'd like to have a safety net of that additional 20lbs.

All right, another late night. Here's to a successful Phase 3! Also, a big thank you to those who have commented on my posts the last few days, I didn't think anyone was reading!

Murphy's Law All Over the Place

VLCDs 22 and 23
Weight 5.9.08 227 (a gain of .2)
Weight 5.10.08 224.8 (a loss of 2.2)
Total Loss this round: 26lbs

This post is going to be short. I had another discouraging day on Friday with the scale up yet again, but it seems to have evened out a bit. No more nibbles at Trader Joe's, no matter how hungry I am. I had such a stressful day today, nearly gave into an urge to have a milkshake. My car, which had just been repaired not 2 weeks ago, broke down on the highway as I was heading for my Saturday morning teaching job. To compound that already stressful situation, I had left my cell phone at home. Argh! One very kind passing motorist later, I had a police escort home (the backs of police cars are NOT built for comfort) and four hours later, my car was towed to the mechanic. I am sure it's a battery/alternator problem, and I am so annoyed that it cost me a morning of teaching. I managed to borrow a friend's second car to get to my restaurant job this afternoon, and I'm going to have to work extra hard for my tips to pay for whatever is wrong! Instead of the aforementioned milkshake however, I had the lesser evil, a coke zero. So glad I didn't give in, but MAN did I ever want to. I hope the scale rewards me for it tomorrow!

On a lovelier note, I heard geese for the first time this spring; looks like they are headed back north, and summer is on its way!

Talk About Speaking Too Soon!

VLCD #21
Weight 5.8.08: 226.8
overnight gain (argh!) of .6lbs
Total loss this round 24lbs

I had a feeling I might jinx myself with yesterday's post of exuberance and hopes of finishing this round early. Ah well. I'm STILL expecting TOM, which is taking its ol' sweet time in arriving, yet showing all signs of being imminent, so perhaps this is a little water weight. I haven't done anything appreciably different, so I'll chalk it up to an ornery body. I did, however, give into a smidgen of temptation today while grocery shopping at Trader Joe's. They had some sort of seasoned steak at their samples table and it smelled absolutely heavenly. I am sure it had been cooked in oil and I'm sure I'll pay for it tomorrow, one mere bite! I do keep dreaming about pigging out on the worst sorts of foods: last night it was melted snickers, mars and three musketeers bars, and something involving melted marshmallow. How odd that everything was melted and soupy in the dream. I don't crave these things in my conscious hours, and the feeling of fear and doom that continues to accompany the dreams tells me my subconscious is just trying to warn me. Maybe the guilt I feel over botching Phase 3 is speaking to me as I sleep. I'm definitely getting the message.

And Another One Bites the Dust (pound, that is)

VLCD Day #20
Weight 5.07.08: 226.2
overnight loss of 1.6 lbs
Total loss this round 24.6lbs

The 220's are fast disappearing. I can feel myself ready to transition into Phase 3 and so part of me is willing the loss to keep this momentum so that 34lbs will come before 40 injections. Then again, another rebellious voice in my head is daring me to see just how much I will lose over the full course of 40 injections. At this rate, that could be well over 40lbs, if it keeps up. I'm waiting to hit a stall or a plateau, and if I get there and am losing less than .6 lbs per day for more than 3 or 4 days I may well end my round early. So far that doesn't seem to be happening, though every morning I stare at the number on the scale in disbelief, weigh myself 2 or 3 times to make sure I'm not still asleep. It really astonishes me, the difference between my first and second round in terms of consistent and dramatic weight loss. On day 20 last round I had lost 16.8lbs, this time I'm almost at 25! I'm convinced it is the injections that make the biggest difference (I did sublingual for the first 3.5 weeks of my first round). But it could also be that the last time I was just getting used to what foods worked for me and how my body reacted to different things. I was eating steak for a good 2 weeks before I tried eliminating it and started to see a pick up in my weight loss. But I had 7 days of gain in the last round, compared with 2 in this round, and 14 days where I lost less than a pound, compared with 3 this round. A very different protocol experience for me this second time. A much easier one at that. I'm also far more busy and active this time around, mostly in my day-to-day activities. I'm thinking I will end this round somewhere between the 17th and 25th of May, instead of going into early June.

Updated Photos

Oh FINALLY

VLCD Days 18 and 19
Weight 5.5.08: 229 (a loss of 2lbs)
Weight 5.6.08: 227.8 (a loss of 1.2lbs)
Total loss this round 23lbs

Well, that protein day seems to have done the trick for me. That and canceling my church job on Sunday and my morning voice lesson on Monday so that I could have a little more rest! I do have a bit of an upset stomach today, which just about never happens to me. Either it's TOM trying to force its way into my consciousness or I ate some undercooked chicken yesterday. Hmmm. It is great to be into the 220's, and my hunger has really disappeared. It took almost 3 weeks, but I got there! I had hard boiled egg/whites and celery for lunch today with a coffee and some strawberries. I felt stuffed, like I had eaten Thanksgiving Dinner with seconds of everything, after my meager repast! I'm pleased, because now I'll find it easier to differentiate between real hunger and a mere craving. I've started dreaming about eating fried or sweet foods--the last two nights now. And instead of enjoying the gorging dreams as I did in my last round, there's this incredible sense of doom and fear as I'm eating in these dreams. "Don't DO THAT", my subconscious seems to be screaming at me!

I'm posting some pictures next, and I didn't see such a huge difference in them. Then I remembered that the pictures I published in my first post were taken at my LIW from last round, at 238/240. Since I put on about 10lbs during Phase 3, you'll only be seeing a 10-12lb difference in these current photos. My inches are not budging much, but I can definitely see my hips and thighs evening out to be more in proportion with the rest of me. And, vanity of vanities, I'm so glad my bust size does not seem to be shrinking that much at all. Whew. Not that I don't have ample to spare, I'm just rather fond of the girls is all.

Tossing Around Eight Tenths of a Pound

VLCD Days 16 and 17
Weight 5.3.08: 231.8 gain of 0.8lbs :(
Weight 5.4.08: 231.0 loss of that same 0.8lbs!
Total 17-day loss: 19.8lbs (just as it was on Friday, harumph)

I'm so close to the 220's! I feel a bit Sisyphus-ian this weekend.

Ahh, so, not much progress made the last couple of days. There are myriad reasons for this, some of them not entirely under my control. I am busy, and getting to bed before midnight is a mere fantasy for me these days. I know an early night helps the HCG to be even more effective, so there's one strike against me. At work, I can't help but encounter the odd plate or bowl with oil on it, and though I wash and wipe my hands constantly, I am sure I've absorbed some. I try to drink enough water throughout my shifts, but that's not always happening very responsibly on my part. Lastly, some pretty strong cramps this evening tell me that TOM is on its way. I'm debating whether to inject right through my period or to stop the way Simeons instructs. Part of me wants to soldier on, and doesn't want to endure 3 or 4 days without HCG. My hunger was just starting to abate! Then again, I don't want to mess up my cycle and have the HCG draw things out even more or make my weight fluctuate too much. I'm going to play it by ear.

I did a 'protein day' day today, and ate only allowed protein sources, three portions instead of two (egg whites, shrimp and chicken). I'm hoping that it will boost me a bit. Truth be told, I was just too lazy (or tired) to prepare all that veg. We'll see what results will be in store for me in the morning!

A New Decade Approaches

VLCD #15: Overnight loss -1.4
Weight 5.2.08 231
Total Loss this round 19.8lbs!

Still going strong, happily, if unbelievably so! The hunger is definitely abating, I can make it through a busy day without feeling too overwhelmed by the need to eat. The Yerba Mate must be doing its thing. I'll be so thrilled if I wake up tomorrow and the scale reads 229.something. I'm wearing my shirts tucked into my trousers, which hasn't happened for me in, well, probably my lifetime! Such a simple thing, but it makes me so happy. I'll have to publish some "halfway" photos, even though I'm only halfway through this round and still have another 2 to go after this. At least. I'm home early from work and getting a very rare early night, so this post is short and sweet. Good night.

Serendipity = -1.4lbs

VLCD Days 13 and 14
Weight 4.30.08 233.8
Weight 5.1.08 232.4
Total loss in 14 days 18.4lbs

I had a strange moment of serendipity last night at my restaurant job. I realized when I got there that I had had only one of my protein meals of the day and had neglected to pack my dinner. I was starving (Weds is my injection skip day). I knew I would not make it through my 7-8 hour shift if I didn't eat SOMETHING. I decided, in a rash moment of extreme hunger, that I would just eat whatever the chef prepared for the staff dinner, regardless of the fat content, starches, I was going to eat it all and brace myself to suffer the consequences. I rationalized that I'd even been losing too well, and that a little setback would do me no harm in the long run. So, after we set up for that evening's opening I went into the kitchen to see what tasty delight awaited us. Lo and behold, the foods on offer were 100% protocol friendly. Amazing. Usually what we are offered is loaded with fat, but last night it was simple roasted white meat chicken with no skin, and salad fixings: tomatoes, lettuce etc. I just skipped the cheese and the dressing and made myself little mini lettuce wraps with tomatoes and chicken. Yes, I mixed veg, and I definitely ate more than 100g of chicken, but it seems to have done me no harm. Someone was looking out for me yesterday! Again, this reinforces something that I do sometimes ignore with my busy schedule:

plan ahead and don't let yourself get too hungry!!

That potential land-mine skirted, I have a renewed sense of focus and determination to kick some of my ample butt into oblivion over the next 4 weeks or so. I joined some friends for ice cream after church choir tonight and was not one iota tempted to cheat. Birthday cake (homemade, double chocolate) was served in honor of my voice teacher's birthday today and, one sniff and I was good to go. That being said, my church choir is having a big end of year dinner on June 5th and that is the 2nd or 3rd day I'll be off the VLCD and let me tell you, the fantasizing is running high! Definitely planning on a 'Steak Day' for June 6th...